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The summer party season is upon us, and the social calendar of this drunken old columnist has never been fuller. But sadly, this year has been a soggy affair for all involved - quite literally a damp squib. Astragal, however, would like to point out that we have known the weather was going to be like this for quite some time. The very merry month of May was wet and windy, June has been the wettest on record and the helpful people at the Met Office have told us that more is to follow. Why then are people resolutely holding their parties in the damp outdoors? Why must this diarist endure his glass of Prosecco or his Champagne cocktail in the pouring rain? Have we lost our minds? Hull is under the Humber, Noah is sailing through Sheffield and Astragal is having to wear waders to fetch his next Bellini. We are not amused.

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