Astragal has been on the receiving end of a rather bizarre communication from ‘The Lord of Harpole, in the Parish of Wickham Market, UK’, who turns out to be Abdul Latif, Britain’s first Bangladeshi lord of the manor (self appointed) and proprietor of the Curry Capital restaurant on Newcastle’s salubrious Bigg Market. Lord Harpole, who apparently has a close relationship with Viz magazine, Astragals’s favoured lavatorial reading material, says he is ‘delighted’ to inform us that he has created the world’s hottest curry – which he has winningly dubbed ‘Curry Hell’. The good lord is inviting Astragal, and any readers who may be interested, to sample said curry, available in vegetarian or non-vegetarian form, and with a side order of naan bread, pilau rice or chips, absolutely free of charge. That is, as long as you manage to eat the entire portion. If not, a princely sum of £6.95 will be charged. Lord Harpole also points out that a takeaway Curry Hell is available anywhere in the world – but you will have to come to the restaurant to pick it up. Any readers who fancy the challenge should visit www.curryhell.com. Astragal is off to stock up on Rennies.